75 Golf Puns, Jokes, & One-Liners That Are Tee-rific

We all love a joke.

When playing with others, a chunk of the round is spent having funny discussions and enjoying each other’s company.

As with anything though, it’s always funnier and even better if you can incorporate some specific humor into your sport – in this case, golf.

Some of them may use golf slang, some may be dad jokes, and others may have your friends in hysterics, contributing to enjoying the game. The jokes can even lighten the mood when your game isn’t going so well.

So, read on to find out some of the best golf puns and funny golf sayings that you can use to get one up on your buddies.

What are Golf Puns?

A golf pun is a joke that takes a word or words in the sport and they are then adapted into a funny manner. For example, green there done that. The original being ‘been there done that’.

Golf puns have been around for as long as we can remember, particularly among amateurs. They are well-loved for adding an extra laugh or two to the round, depending on how good the joke is.

After all, golf is all about enjoying the sport and having fun, so any ways that encourage that in a friendly manner are always welcome.

75 of The Best Golf Puns Explained

People laughing from golf puns near the golf car on the playing course

Here is a list of some of the best play on words in golf and their meanings:

  1. May the course be with you – Star Wars reference: ‘May the force be with you’
  2. That was par-fect – a par being the number of shots a proficient golfer should complete a round in
  3. Green there done that – play on words of ‘been there done that’
  4. Fairway to heaven – play on words of Stairway To Heaven by Led Zeppelin
  5. Green and bear it – play on words of ‘grin and bear it’
  6. Kiss my putt – play on words of ‘kiss my butt’
  7. Swingin’ in the rain – related to song Singin’ in the Rain
  8. Let’s have a par-tee – party time after making par on the course
  9. You’re a social putter-fly – if you are rather outgoing on the course, you may be known as this rather than a social butterfly
  10. I’m having a rough time – if you can’t get out of the rough on the course, this may be you
  11. Let it tee – rather than let it be
  12. You are my cup of tee – rather than tea, could be used as a chat-up line to a fellow golfer
  13. Lost fore words – you could be speechless at how your shot ended up meaning you had to shout ‘fore’
  14. Who’s the caddy? – a play on words of ‘who’s the daddy?’ or the best
  15. I like big putts and I cannot lie – you can work this out for yourself
  16. The Duke of Hazards – play on words of the film, The Dukes of Hazzard
  17. That is a chip shot – instead of a cheap shot
  18. No ifs and putts about it – rather than ifs and butts
  19. See you a round – play on words with the greeting ‘see you around’ you may use after finishing a round
  20. Call me the golf-father – rather than the godfather
  21. Ball or nothing – instead of ‘all’, though in golf you will take the ball or nothing too
  22. I am going to visit the Golf of Thailand – rather than Gulf
  23. You are the best, by par – play on words of ‘best by far’
  24. You’ve got to green and bear it – instead of grin and bear it by getting on with it
  25. I’m golfing tomorrow, wood you like to join me? – the wooden club instead of would
  26. Putter late than never – instead of better
  27. You stay putt – rather than put
  28. It’s ball or nothing – rather than all
  29. You’re driving me up the wall – referencing a driver
  30. Down putt not out – instead of but
  31. That shot was so bad it nearly had me in a hos-putt-al – rather than hospital
  32. You spend more time in the sand than Pamela Anderson – a star of Baywatch, a TV program set on the beach
  33. It’s fore the best – instead of for
  34. Golf forth and prosper – rather than go
  35. I’m not sure about that fringe – could be used to joke with your friend’s hair as well as the grass
  36. It doesn’t get putter than this – instead of better
  37. I love our friend-chip – including a chip shot in the word friendship
  38. Happy hole-days – instead of holidays
  39. You’re very eagle-tistical – rather than ego
  40. What a load of trap – don’t think we need to explain this one
  41. You have a lot of par-severance – instead of perseverance
  42. You’ve got putter fingers – if you can’t grip the club properly, this works well instead of butter
  43. You are tee-riffic at golf – play on words of terrific
  44. I fore-give you – instead of forgive
  45. Asking fore a friend – rather than for
  46. This is by par the best golf course I have played – instead of far
  47. Earned your s-wings – added the s, in golf it means you have proven your ability and skill
  48. A tee-mendous shot – instead of tremendous
  49. As par as the eye can see – rather than far
  50. You e-putt-omize everything good about golf – instead of epitomize
  51. That was un-fore-gettable – rather than unforgettable
  52. To tee or not to tee, that is the question – instead of be
  53. A chip off the old block – the same word, just golf related
  54. Wipe your tee-rs – instead of tears
  55. Hole-d on a minute – rather than hold
  56. You are my cup of tee – rather than tea
  57. Green, aren’t you! – instead of keen
  58. There’s only one fairway to settle it – using fair way as one word instead of two
  59. Just fore-get about it – instead of forget
  60. The hole is too par away – rather than far
  61. You are driving me crazy – play on words using drive
  62. Want to go to the club? – not the club you are thinking of
  63. I can see you going par in life – instead of far
  64. It was en-golf-ed in the fire – instead of engulfed
  65. In a land fore, fore away – rather than far
  66. Fore-get me not – instead of forget
  67. Keep an eagle eye on the ball – quite literally
  68. Thanks fore a great game – instead of for
  69. You’re an eagle beaver, aren’t you? – instead of eager
  70. Always look fore-ward – rather than forward
  71. Can’t golf you out of my mind – rather than get
  72. He sported a hole-istic approach – instead of holistic
  73. I appreciate the in-fore-mation – instead of information
  74. Fore-merly, she was a great golfer – rather than formerly
  75. Keep your eye on the ball – this applies to golf too

How To Create Your Own Puns in Golf

We encourage readers to spice up their game with some of their own golf puns and enjoy sharing them with their friends or family members on the course.

It’s easier than you think. If you are unsure how to get started, just search some common golf terms and play around with them so the puns sound similar to existing words. For example, ‘par-fect,’ tee-riffic,’’ and ‘birdie-licious.’

Have a think and give one a go on your next round…

5 Funny Golf Jokes

Below are 5 of the best golf jokes around.

Q: What is a golfer’s favorite bird?

A: An Eagle

Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

A: In case he got a hole in one

Q: What are golfers most scared of?

A: The Bogeyman

Q: What is a golfer’s favorite thing that their partner says to them?

A: Talk birdie to me

Q: What is a golfer’s favorite film?

A: The Shawshank Redemption

Read more: Famous Golf Quotes From Legends Of The Game

Best Funny Golf One Liners

  1. Golf balls are like eggs – they’re white, sold by the dozen, and after a week, you need to buy more.
  2. Would you like a cup of tea with that slice?
  3. Your swing is like being in the army: left, right, left, right
  4. I’m a scratch golfer – every time I hit the ball, I scratch my head and wonder where on Earth it went.
  5. The best wood in a lot of golfer’s bags is the pencil.
  6. Should I call 911? Seems like you are choking.
  7. My dog wouldn’t find that even if it had bacon around it
  8. Golf is like taxes – you go for the green and come out in the hole
  9. I shot one under on the course today – one under the tree
  10. I didn’t get any work done today, I was too busy puttering around

Final Thoughts

Now you know some of the best one-liners to use in golf, some golf dad jokes, and some of the best golf puns.

Whether they are funny or not is down to you and what you think of them. Hopefully, you enjoyed them and can use some yourself now. If not, at least you can put one together for maximum impact with you and your golfing buddies.

Jack was inspired by his Grandad Ron’s golfing and grew up playing this great game. Jack has a handicap index in the 30s and plays with the PING K15 driver and irons. Jack has written more than 40 articles on GolfSpan since 2022. Jack is always looking for ways to find the edge on the course to share with readers and played monthly at High Legh Golf Club near his home in Warrington, Cheshire. You can connect with Jack on X and LinkedIn.

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